Limericks @ the Alehouse (Dirty They’ll Be)

Nov 4, 2013

Jan AlejandroYou’ll have a mistress for the evening (Mimi Chen of 100.3 FM The Sound)

You will have a host (Jan Michael Alejandro).

A full bar will be at your disposal (no, that doesn’t mean “free) to reinforce nerves before taking the stage.

The tables will be full at the Altadena Ale & Wine House with guests refining their lines, sipping a beer and dousing their doubts, distracting themselves with chatter and nervous laughter. Not everyone who came for the show will fit in the main room, so bodies will spill out into the bar area, down the hall, all the way to the back smoking cubicle (sitting area).

Before nerves can overwhelm, the alcohol will soothe and relax, the lively raucous air will bolster, and an evening of limericks (dirty and otherwise) shall begin.

The evening will “feature the wit of Vanja Scholls, Sharon McNight, Jeff Goode, Helen Geller, Molly Moran, Leslie Spring, Alastair Boase, Jennifer Boase & Billsie.” Special guests are a secret to be revealed, but we have learned that Leslie Spring will be performing.

Host and organizer Alejandro of Nail Soup Productions writes “This is great—almost clean—fun. The patron’s of the Altadena Ale House, who include employees (of) JPL and NPR, write original material and many of them come up on stage (after a few drinks) and perform them.”

From listening to many of the presenters at Thee 1st Annual L.A. Limerick Fest, we can say that “almost clean” does not apply. Dirty, bawdy, explicit, rude, crude, and laugh out loud funny would be more appropriate. (So you’ve been warned.) (Only PG limericks have been included in this article out of respect for our readers.)

Jan Michael Alejandro, Stephanie Alejandro, Belfast Limerist Chris, Mimi Chen, and Arlene Alejandro

Jan, Stephanie Alejandro, Belfast Limerist Chris, Mimi Chen, and Arlene Alejandro; photo courtesy of

This year’s event is dedicated to Leon Schwartz, a dear friend of Jan and his family. Schwartz was a professor of French at CSULA for 44 years, a poet, an author, and an Air Force and World War II veteran. Listen to his moving poem “Don’t Be Surprised” here.

Hula Beulah by Leon Schwartz
There was a Yale lass from Missoula
Who decided to take up the hula.
With her grass skirt and lei,
Hers was quite a display,
And the Yale lads all sang, “Beulah Beulah!”

Leon Schwartz; photo by Paul T. Bradley

Leon Schwartz; photo by Paul T. Bradley

Enjoy a few more samplings, this time in regard to the debt ceiling…(from with former host, and Limerick Fest supporter, Tess Vigeland)

By Molly Moran:
An austerity belt arouses mixed feelings
About proposals to raise the debt ceiling
If we’ll have more to borrow
I’ll start my diet tomorrow
In an outfit that looks more appealing.

Marketplace Money, senior producer Irishman Paddy Hirsh:
On Sunday, I have to do taxes.
But Saturday’s the feast of St. Patricks!
If I’m still drunk when I file
I’ll end up in jail
Could you suggest a hangover prophylaxis?

Proceeds go to “A Case for the Cure” to benefit City of Hope.

The 4th Annual Los Angeles Limerick Festival
Tuesday, Nov. 12th, 7-10 p.m.
The Altadena Ale & Wine House, 2329 Fair Oaks Ave., Altadena 91001
Cost: $10
For more info, call 626.794.4577 or email
Or visit

100.3 FM's Mimi Chen; photo by Paul T. Bradley

100.3 FM’s Mimi Chen; photo by Paul T. Bradley

Listen to Leon Schwartz at Thee 1st Annual Los Angeles Limerick Fest:

1 Response for “Limericks @ the Alehouse (Dirty They’ll Be)”

  1. Alan Gordon says:

    Sorry to hear of the passing of Professor Schwartz. He was my teacher at Cal State L.A. Didn’t know he had such an expansive sense of humor.



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